If summer is the season of casual, short-lived romances and flirty hookups, maybe winter is the season of serious dating and questions like, "We've only been together for three weeks. Is a gift card too impersonal of a Christmas gift?"
Indeed, says two Manhattan women who turned to Craigslist to summon applications for "fall boyfriends."
The ad offers zero information about the women besides smart/funny/attractive. But with guidelines for applicants like "Probs spent at least 4 weekends in Montauk over the summer" and "Ivy league preferred. Def in a frat or played a sport," we can conclude they're those girls at the bar who laugh really loud to show everyone that they've got great senses of humor (read: intensely annoying).
It's another addition to the list of notable Craigslist ads ("Looking for boys we might be able to stand being sober around" is kind of funny), and a nice little read, if two of your hobbies listed on LinkedIn include cringing and getting a mild headache.
And for every person who says "This is satire!" there are probably several who think this ad is perfection and are firing up their Craigslist accounts right now. The post has been flagged for removal, but hopefully not before they found two chill bros for Sunday Fundays.
Full text of the ad below. Photo via.
Seeking Fall Boyfriends
2 smart, funny, attractive girls each looking for a fall boyfriend with chill group of bro friends, now is the time you must start dating someone in order to spend the holidays together/go on ski trips/have a NYE kiss you're stoked on.
Labor Day has happened, we are saying goodbye and filtering out our casual summer, meet up at 2 a.m. hook ups and are looking for boys we might be able to stand being sober around.
Needed: 2 males interested in something steady/serious-ish as the weather fades from hot, humid, and care-free to crisp, chill Patagonia vest season. Interested parties should have a window in their bedroom and want to cuddle with the window slightly open to let the fresh autumn air in while a fall scented candle (that I'll buy for you, babe) fills the room with cozy comfort.
Chill group of guy friends (preference will be given to bros who come from the same group of friends, just because that makes it easier and more fun for double date brunching)
27 and older
6 feet or taller (if you're 5'11" but have a personality to make up for the height difference, willing to consider it. Any shorter? Don't apply.)
Wardrobe should include: Driving mocs, Barbour coat, Half-Zips (at least 3, please send pics if possible), Ray-Bans (Wayfarers or Clubmastesr preferred, but open to other styles), loafers, Patagonia vest(s), Vineyard Vines, basketball shorts for me to sleep in
College education. Ivy league preferred. Def in a frat or played a sport (lacrosse, crew, tennis, etc.)
Probs spent at least 4 weekends in Montauk over the summer
Activities can include but are not limited to
Borrowing your pullover and returning it after an indecent amount of time, if at all
Taking selfies in Patagonia vests/taking selfies while doing all activities #fall #boyfriendweather
Watching football (aka me getting drunk while you watch football, and you thinking it's so adorable when I wear jeans and Converse to the bar and get blackout in your team's hat.) *sneakers show how chill and laid back I am < this is why it's kinda essential for the two boys to be friends so me and my friend can blackout together and I won't get bored.
Cooking - Instagramming dish with captions such as "Fall night with my babe @yourhandle *heart emoji all the fall emojis*"
Brunching outdoors until weather permits
Strange how the night moves, with autumn closing in
(If you don't know that song, don't apply)
Looking forward to meeting you!