Don't Get Too Excited About the Steamy Curves in Carl's Jr.'s 'Natural Beauties' Ad

If you were looking forward to drooling over whatever hot, near-naked model would grace Carl's Jr.'s notoriously lascivious advertising next, you're in for a disappointment.

In a new 30-second commercial, the crass burger chain plays on its reputation for portraying women as pieces of meat who love to eat smaller pieces of meat in the most ridiculously carnal way possible. But here, it turns out the sweaty, glistening curves belong to something way less titillating.

Titled "Natural Beauties," the concept is essentially a rehash of one of the older jokes in the book, if cleverly tailored to poke fun—in a nonetheless leering, winking sort of way—at the brand's history of scantily clad talent including Charlotte McKinney, Kate Upton, Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton.

In the end, it's all just part of Carl's Jr. attempt to make its products seem less terrible for your health—i.e., natural. Everyone knows that's a nonsense classification to begin with, and seems particularly half-hearted here—which is fitting, because each time you eat one of the brand's hot-dog-and-potato-chips-on-a-burger burgers, half your heart is probably liable to just give up.

CREDITS
Client: Carl's Jr.
Chief Executive Officer: Andy Puzder
Chief Marketing Officer: Brad Haley
SVP, Product Marketing: Bruce Frazer
Director of Advertising: Brandon LaChance
VP, Field Marketing, Media & Merchandising: Steve Lemley
Director, Product Marketing & Merchandising: Christie Cooney
Product Marketing Manager: Allison Pocino

72andSunny Team
Chief Creative Officer: Glenn Cole
Group Creative Director: Justin Hooper
Group Creative Director: Mick DiMaria
Creative Director: Tim Wettstein
Creative Director: Mark Maziarz
Sr. Designer: Marcus Wesson
Group Strategy Director: Matt Johnson
Strategy Director: Kasia Molenda
Strategist: Eddie Moraga
Group Brand Director: Alexis Coller
Sr. Brand Manager: Scott Vogelsong
Brand Coordinator: Anthony Fernandez
Director of Film Production: Sam Baerwald
Executive Film Producer: Molly McFarland
Jr. Film Producer: Kira Linton
Film Production Coordinator: Taylor Stockwell
Business Affairs Director: Amy Jacobsen
Business Affairs Manager: Jennifer Jahinian
Business Affairs Coordinator: Ryan Alls